Post-22 Reflections

...There was once a dream that was Happiness. You could only whisper it. Anything more than a whisper and it would vanish... it was so fragile....

My 22nd birthday (on 8 August) is past, and i feel so old and weary, like a Werner's Syndrome of the mind. There has been too much free radical damage, and too little repair.

I have seen life, about one-third of the average human life span. And i do not like what i see. I have seen the loneliness which gnaws at the heart of human condition. I have seen the upholding of traditions at the cost of individual happiness. I have seen the malice and darkness that resides in the soul. I have seen Eros being turned into vice. I have seen humans being born in chains. I have seen infinity withering away into decay. I have seen Hell being paved with good intentions. I have seen the volcanic anguish of a muffled scream. I have seen bitterness which permeats the endocardium. I have seen society invent insanity. I have seen the beauty in life being crucified on the cross of morality. I have seen chaos in a pair of eyes.

Is it not enough to make anyone feel old?

Comments

Mayhem said…
That is what you call 'life'. *sighs*

The funny part is none of us wanted to come and now none of us want to go. We wither with time, get old; even for heaven.
Abdullah Shahid said…
Guess you concentrate on the dark part only :-p
Salman Latif said…
I must say those are the stark realities of life.
But well....there are those little nothing, tiny some-things that mark it's beauty too. The twinkle of an eye, the smile of a face, a fine rain, few encouraging words, a fine fellow now and then, some piece of wisdom revealed unto intellect - you got to start looking to the goods too (:
Salman Latif said…
And btw, belated Happy Birthday :P
Butters said…
Why is that all you see? Because, whether you realize it or not, you have made a commitment to see only those things. And this, ironically, is precisely what it means for beauty to be crucified on the cross of morality, though in this case it is not just morality, but weariness.

I see the miracle of the creation of new life, and of the rising of human intellect through all kinds of dirt and poverty. I see the advance of technology, and of interdependence, and the empowerment of people and nations who were previously poor and colonized. I see people falling in love, and the passionate pursuit of ideals; but alas, not enough of it. If people invigorated themselves and woke up, took the frightening step of being strong and not merely harmless, then perhaps this weariness wouldn't consume them.

Remember, Awais, that God is Life. If you truly believe this, nothing can tire you.
life.. so silly and so stupid!

but well done...
it is an awakenin from ur end!
mania said…
try searching happiness inside you ...then the outside world look much better than you thought.
Anonymous said…
Once a person said to God :"I hate life"

God replied : "who told you to love life,love me and your life will become beautiful".
true, I feel the same way, especially about Pakistani society. sigh.
Anonymous said…
one feels being old only perhaps because his mind stores many of the passing moments,days,and nights.The very phenomenon of recall is responsible for permiiting tht feeling to arise.Human mind is helpless and weak in being unable to omit recall process.
Now what is recalled and what omitted is governed to some extent by ones minds state.
In ur case, mind is of rebellious nature.