Friendship and Romance

"Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship."
Oscar Wilde

I think it depends a lot on social context. Friendship between men and women is possible, but only in certain social scenarios, which are liberal enough to conceive of such a thing... in many others, it is quite inconceivable. Our social interaction depends a lot on 'symbols' and 'signs'. Actions have a symbolic value... which is different in different contexts. That is to say, it is the social context which imparts a particular interpretation to a particular act. An action which might be considered as 'flirting' in a semi-traditional society might well be considered a 'friendly gesture' in a more liberal one. When everyone interprets a particular symbol in a particular way, then it becomes somewhat meaningless what the original intentions are. And perhaps the person who is doing that action himself becomes confused about his intentions, because if he is intelligent enough, he will be aware that the action he is commiting has a dual meaning.

The point being that in a semi-traditional society, even a friendly beginning ultimately winds up being a romantic affair (exceptions are always there).


Sometimes I do wonder about this: if 'close' friendship can actually exist between the opposite genders. Having many guy friends myself, I still feel like if I get too close to anyone... it would soon change into something else, unless we both are in a relationship. (oddly enough, they feel the same way)
People are not willing to accept it but attraction exists after all. We can't help it.
But sometimes we are willing to take chances for friendship, at least I do and not always do we get disappointed :)
Awais said…
People are not willing to accept it but attraction exists after all. We can't help it.

A factor which i didn't consider in the post is the biological factors.
Humans are biologically programmed to feel attraction for the opposite sex. Social impulse can sometimes overcome this romantic-cum-sexual attraction, but in many cases, the biological impulse is too strong to be suppressed by social impulse.
[Kay] said…
Maybe the two people should themselves know what they want in their relationship,frindship or romance.
@ish said…
u kno i often find myself asking the same question
"Between men and women there is no friendship possible"why?
how could it be ..i believe tht evrythng strts frm frndship hw can they be in a relationship widout being frnds at the frst place...?
the kind of attraction they feel is a vry strng frndship but we dnt wnt to call it a frndship because for these ppl its smthn else....but if look deeper foundation started frm frndship..
Anonymous said…
Friends we'll be forever
No matter what they say
Each of us so special
In very different way
here alot of friendship poem
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